- Michel knocks on the window -

Teddy CIA: "You want poker, or whore?"

Michel: "Poker. Give me three stacks of high, elitist society."

-----

Michel: "I raise."

Teddy CIA: "It's a position raise. I call."

- The flop comes 5-7-A, with two diamonds -

Michel: "I bet the pot."

Teddy CIA: "I raise the pot."

Michel: "I reraise the pot."

Teddy CIA: "I reraise the pot."

Michel: "Pot."

Teddy CIA: "Pot."

Michel: "Pot."

Teddy CIA: "Pot."

Michel: "Pot."

Teddy CIA: "Pot."

Michel (voiceover): "I sit back and think. I have three aces - the best possible hand. I want him to think I'm debating a call, but really I'm just thinking about Monte Carlo, and whatever the [censored] is in Monte Carlo."

Michel: *shrugs* "Okay, well, I re-pot it, I'm all in, because I don't think you have a pair." *winks at the camera*

Teddy CIA: "Who are you winking at? It doesn't matter, I call."

Michel (voiceover): "I know before he even says it."

Teddy CIA: "I have 8-6-4-3 with two diamonds, for a wrap straight draw and a flush draw, which is a favorite over your top set."

- Turn is a King. River is a 2 which gives Teddy CIA an ace-to-five straight for the win. -

- Michel sits there, shell-shocked. -

Joey Croissant: "Come on, I'll get you a whore."

-----

Michel (voiceover): "Well, that sucked. Since then, I've sworn off of poker and made my living as a roadside prostitute for boorish American tourists.  Hopefully, I can pay my way through law school that way. I can always find games, though. I could turn this truck onto the road and be at the Taj in 19 and a half hours."

-----

Michel (voiceover): "I'm here to pick my friend Worm up from prison."

- Worm walks out of prison -

Michel: "Worm! It's wonderful to see you!"

- They kiss each other passionately on the mouth -

Michel: "How was prison?"

Worm: "I was brutally sodomized on a regular basis."

-----

Michel: "Look...Croissant, I never told you this, but about a year ago, I was playing poker at the Casino des Atlantes, and Marcel Luske walks in. He sits down at the 50/100 pot limit game. And, I mean, the whole place stops, right? Just watching this guy play. After a while there isn't a retarded European gambling game going, because everybody's just, you know, watching this guy."

- Joey Croissant nods -

Michel: "So you know what I did? I sat down."

Joey Croissant: "No way, you need at least 300,000 euros to sit down at a game like that. Such bad financial management is typical of a boorish
American!"

- Joey Croissant and Michel laugh for twenty-six minutes -

Michel: "Right, okay, but seriously, I played for an hour, doing nothing but folding. Then I won a huge pot."

Joey Croissant: "Aces? Kings? Ace-King doublesuited? Suited aces? High connectors? Middle doublesuited connectors? Two big pair?"

Michel: "Rags."

Joey Croissant: "That's probably fine too, you're only like a 48/52 dog."

Michel: "I raised. And he came over the top of me, like I was a boorish American. I re-popped it. He potted it again. I think for like two seconds and then I re-pot it."

Joey Croissant: "Jesus [censored] Christ, how much money did you have?"
Michel: "After I bet I would quietly slide my chips back toward my stack, nobody noticed. Anyway, he thinks for a while, looks at me, checks his cards again, and he mucks. I take it down. And then he looks at me and says, 'I have to know. Did you have it?' And I said, 'I'm sorry Marcel, I can't remember.'"

Joey Croissant: "Face!"

Michel: "I know, totally. Anyway, based on that one hand, I felt confident gambling for all the money I had, at one time."

-----

Law Professor: "I am a Jew."

Michel: "I hate you."

-----

Teddy CIA: "We play, heads up, Pot Limit Omaha, 25 and 50 blinds, until one of us has it all?"

Michel: "Out of sheer curiosity, you realize you're giving up like boat loads of equity by agreeing to gamble for money that's effectively yours anyway, right? That you could just not let me play, and then kill me and take what I have?"

Teddy CIA: "I know, but I am a boorish American!"

- Michel and Teddy CIA laugh for seventy-two minutes -

-----

Michel (voiceover): "I pick up Ace-Ace-Jack-Ten doublesuited."

Michel: "I raise the pot."

Teddy CIA: "Very aggressive. But, I reraise the pot."

Michael (voiceover): "He's representing Ace-Ace-King-King doublesuited, the only hand better than mine. I can't call, and give him a chance to catch. I can only fold...if I believe him."

Michel: "I reraise, I'm all in."

Teddy CIA: "Take it down."

-----

- The flop reads 10-9-5, with two spades -

Michel: "Pot."

Teddy CIA: "Pot."

Michel: "Pot."

Teddy CIA: "Pot."

Michel: "Pot."

Teddy CIA: "Pot."

Michel: "Pot. I'm all in."

Teddy CIA: "Alright, I call. What do you have?"

Michel: "Jack high flush draw and middle set."

Teddy CIA: "Wrap, with a king high flush draw."

Michel: "Boy, I sure hope my 5:4 edge holds up, otherwise I am going to die."

- Turn is an off-suit 5, giving Michel an unbeatable hand. But the river is the ace of spades anyway, because it's always the [censored] ace of spades. -

Teddy CIA: "He beat me. Pay that man his money. His silly, silly-looking European money."

-----

Cab Driver: "Where are you off to?"

Michel: "Monte Carlo."

Cab Driver: "Good luck."

Michel: "Shut the [censored] up."

Two cab rides to the Bellagio and back gave me a large enough bankroll that I can now enter at least a couple tournaments during my stay. After attending the World Series once as a fan (back in the Binion’s era) and once as a full-time writer (last year), this year I’m going to actually do some playing. I wonder if my having not played at all in the last six months is going to be any sort of handicap. I am hoping to be more fresh than rusty.

As important as the Bellagio jaunt was (no cab rides, no bankroll, no playing), I had to pull myself away from the $5,000 Pot-Limit Omaha with ReBuys events to do it, which wasn’t easy considering how talented the players at the final table were: Devilfish Ulliot, Humberto Brenes, John Juanda. Minh Ly. Any of these names ring a bell? 

I sat down at the newly designed final table area (last year’s high-school football stadium look has definitely been elevated at least to the big-time collegiate level) just in time to catch Devilfish run into the Shark. While in the natural world Brenes would win every time, at the poker table it’s a different story. Especially at pot-limit Omaha. While Brenes is pretty good at this game, Ulliot is excellent. Case in point: everyone folded to him on the button and he merely limped in with [Qd Qc 7h 6h]. I really like this play. Brenes was the short stack at the table, and I believe Devilfish knew Brenes would be looking to get his money in with just about any hand. (The alternative theory is that Devilfish didn’t want to overplay his queens and was content to see a flop with position on his opponents.) Brenes raised all in with AK85, which with three cards of the same suit really isn’t much of an Omaha hand. Devilfish called pretty quickly, which gives credence to theory number one. Devilfish won by making a queen-high flush, and I can’t say that I was upset. I can only take so much of the Shark shtick.

The other hand (and bust out) of note in the early afternoon occurred after Erik Cajelais opened with a raise and John Juanda reraised with the last of his chips. Erik was pretty much priced in to calling the $215,000 raise, and he had a decent enough hand to do it with [Kc Qc 10h 10s]. Juanda, of course, had aces (as well as a pair of eights). You can’t do any better than pushing all your money into the pot with a pair of aces (one of which was suited) but the flop gave Erik a wrap, and the queen of diamonds on the river made his straight. Juanda was gone in seventh place. 

It was at that point that I had a decision to make: more final table action or self-preservation in the form of bankroll accumulation. As you well know, I chose the latter, and I’m glad I did. As fun as it’s been to watch other people play cards for bracelets all these years, well, it’s not as fun as doing it yourself.

So far in the 4 hours of play I've learned that trying to blog on a blackberry sucks, Mike Matusow talks a lot, Ted Forrest likes to prop bet, bluffing with king high in stud 8 is a bad idea, and Perry Friedman sould not dye his hair with a red skunk stripe. After the dinner break I'm looking forward to my impending showdown with the tiny swashbuckler, Pescatori. Ciao